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Irene Schreiner, couples therapist: “There are 5 romantic comedies you should watch with your partner and 5 you should avoid”

Several experts recommend love tapes that are useful for strengthening relationships and warn about others that are unhealthy.

Manresca

Update: Feb 22nd, 2026 10:00 EST

Picking a romantic comedy to watch with your partner sounds like the perfect plan: something light, funny, and guaranteed to end well. But from a therapist’s perspective, rom‑coms don’t always tell the full truth about love.

Several couples therapists shared their thoughts on which movies can spark healthy conversations about relationships—and which ones promote unrealistic expectations. Among them is Irene Schreiner, a licensed marriage and family therapist and owner of Solid Foundations Therapy. Schreiner says the biggest issue with the genre is its narrow focus:

“They only highlight the early phase of a relationship, when we’re genuinely obsessed with our partners and only see the good,” she explains. “They cover a very short period of time and usually avoid the real challenges couples actually face.”

Still, some films manage to go deeper than fantasy.

Romantic comedies worth watching as a couple

1. Isn’t It Romantic (2019)

Starring Rebel Wilson, the movie follows a woman who wakes up inside a picture‑perfect rom‑com after hitting her head—complete with a dream apartment, designer clothes, and glamorous dates.

Schreiner appreciates it precisely because it’s over the top: “It’s the only rom‑com I can think of, as a therapist, that I’d actually recommend because it pokes fun at all the romantic clichés.” By parodying the genre, it helps viewers question its messages.

2. Crazy, Stupid, Love (2011)

Therapist Laura Petiford recommends this one for its honest portrayal of a couple on the brink of divorce and the ripple effects on their family. She says it captures both the strength and fragility of long‑term relationships.

It also highlights a crucial point: maintaining individuality is essential for sustaining attraction over time.

Irene Schreiner, couples therapist: “There are 5 romantic comedies you should watch with your partner and 5 you should avoid”

3. The Big Sick (2017)

Aleigh Huston‑Lyons praises this film for its nuanced look at an intercultural relationship shaped by family expectations and cultural differences. She says it’s full of vulnerability—something central to real couples work.

It also shows how deeply rooted family values can influence, and sometimes strain, a relationship.

4. 10 Things I Hate About You (1999)

Beyond the ’90s nostalgia, Huston‑Lyons points to the famous scene where the protagonist lists her love interest’s flaws but admits she loves him anyway.

The takeaway: every relationship has friction. The question is whether you reject someone for their imperfections or embrace the whole person.

5. It’s Complicated (2009)

Another Petiford pick, this film explores lingering feelings between ex‑spouses who reconnect years after their divorce. It reflects a real truth: ending a marriage doesn’t instantly erase emotional ties.

At the same time, reopening that door can be painful—especially for the family.

Rom‑coms to watch with caution (or not use as relationship models)

• Pretty Woman (1990)

A classic, but Petiford warns about the extreme power imbalance between the leads—financial, educational, and lifestyle differences the movie never explores realistically. In real life, she says, those gaps would likely cause conflict.

• Sex and the City (2008)

Huston‑Lyons criticizes how the film turns normal pre‑wedding doubts into a dramatic crisis. Feeling fear or uncertainty before marriage is human, she explains, but the movie frames it as an unforgivable betrayal.

• The Notebook (2004)

Beloved by audiences, but problematic from a therapeutic standpoint. The film reinforces the idea that grand gestures and intense passion solve relationship problems. In real life, satisfaction comes from everyday interactions—not isolated epic moments.

• My Big Fat Greek Wedding (2002)

Charming and funny, but the level of family interference shown would make autonomy nearly impossible in real life. Living next door to your parents may be comedic on screen, but off‑screen it often creates tension.

The bottom line from therapists

As Irene Schreiner and others emphasize, romantic comedies can be fun and even useful conversation starters—but they shouldn’t become the standard by which real relationships are measured. Lasting love looks far less like a two‑hour script and far more like the accumulation of small, everyday gestures.