NFL Power Rankings after Week 2: Chiefs hang on, Texans jump up, Cowboys flop

For anyone thinking that the second week of the NFL season was going to clear things up for us in terms of who the power houses of the league are, think again. The Raiders beating the Ravens in Baltimore? The Saints dominating the Cowboys in Dallas? The Vikings spanking the Niners with Sam Darnold at QB? Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the new age of the NFL. Nothing makes sense, and everything is chaos.

This week we do our best to pick up the pieces and try to put a Power Rankings together that might make a hint of sense.

1) Kansas City Chiefs 2-0, last week 1

Another close call for the Chiefs but another win right at the buzzer puts them at 2-0 after two weeks. Lesser educated people than the author of this article might think that two narrow victories, escaping the jaws of defeat in the final seconds might be a red flag. This is in fact a character building phase of the season for a team full of budding stars. Playoff games are close games. AFC North teams are physical, nasty football teams. Getting past two of them in back-to-back weeks tells me this team is ready for who ever wants some of Debo. Just a quick side note, Pacheco going to the IR is troubling, but Patrick Mahomes is capable of carrying this team for a few weeks.

2) Houston Texans 2-0, last week 6

Sometimes you have to win ugly, and that’s exactly what it was in Houston on Sunday night: ugly. C.J. Stoud and the offense came out scoring on their opening three drives against a good Bears defense, and never looked like they would give up the lead to the struggling Chicago offense. One of the biggest things Stroud did in Week 2 was not get caught up in the moment, and try to dazzle against a QB everyone thinks will be the new and improved version of him. He’s calm. He’s mature. He’s intelligent beyond his years. And he’s a winner

3) Detroit Lions 1-1, last week 2

Are we chalking that loss up to the Bucs being good or the Lions being just a teensy bit over hyped? I’ll admit, I was the first one to jump aboard the Lions bandwagon, but the Bucs mean business and I think the Lions got caught off guard after their season opener. Welcome to the pole position Detroit. You are going to get everyone’s best shot every week. No time to sit and sulk. Time to brush this one off and prove you are an elite team in the NFC.

4) Baltimore Ravens 1-1, last week 3

Keeping the game close but eventually losing in KC won’t drop you down the standings too much, in fact it might win you props. Keeping the game close but eventually losing to the Raiders at home will sink you down the standings in a hurry. The Ravens might be an NFC North team, but they are a flashy team. They don’t like when teams come in and hit them in the mouth and that’s what the Raiders did to the Ravens in Week 2.

5) San Francisco 49ers 1-1, last week 4

You can fill the void left in the backfield by Christian McCaffery’s injury for maybe a week, but eventually the 49ers were going to feel his absence. Jordan Mason still had 100 yards rushing, but when they needed to make plays at important moments in the game Purdy didn’t have the guy he trusts the most on the field. It’s a shocking loss, but it’s not the end of the world for the Niners. Deebo Samuel joining McCaffery on the injured list is the bigger concern for San Fran coming out of this week.

6) Buffalo Bills 2-0, last week 11

The Bills went into Miami barley broke a sweat in the Southern Florida humidity, extending their dominance over the Dolphins for yet another game. That’s 12 of 13 wins for Josh Allen against the franchise that he uses as his punching bag twice a year. The great thing about the Bills win down south was Allen barley had to do anything. He threw the ball 19 times, and watched along with the rest of the world as James Cook and the defense put on a show on Thursday night. They have hurt me before, but I’m a gluten for punishment. I’m not ashamed to admit, I’m digging this Bills team.

7) New Orleans Saints 2-0, last week 17

We said last week, the Saints-Cowboys was going to be a game to determine who is for real in the NFC after opening week blowouts by both teams. The Saints made the Panthers look like a PeeWee team in Week 1 and they made the Cowboys look like the Panthers in Week 2.

8) Tampa Bay Buccaneers 2-0, last week 14

The Bucs knew they caught our eye in Week 1. Now that they have our attention they plan on keeping it for a while. Mayfield had a modest day in a game that the Lions out gained the Bucs by 250 yards. The Bucs defense bent but didn’t break against the Lions who were picked off and turned it over on downs twice in their final three possessions. It was a different looking win than the one against the Commanders, but this Tampa team has shown they are as complete of a team as we have seen two weeks into the season.

9) Philadelphia Eagles, 1-1 last week 7

With 100 seconds left, there was no conceivable way that the Eagles were going to lose to the Falcons. It’s almost karma isn’t it. Before the third down drop by Saquon Barkley, the thought process had to be: EVEN if we don’t get this first down, everything will have to go perfect for the Falcons for us to blow this game. Well Barkley opened that door with his drop and Cousins kicked it down. This team is still fragile and their fan base is still volatile after their late season collapse. These kinds of games will open old wounds from a season ago.

10) Dallas Cowboys 1-1, last week 5

Welcome back down to Earth Cowboys fans. That didn’t take long at all. I promise I don’t take joy in watching Dallas lose, but there is something poetic about watching Jerry Jones’ face in the suite as his team gets put to the slaughter. He is the personification of every Cowboys fan who was ready to book their trip to New Orleans for Super Bowl Sunday after Week 1.

11) Los Angeles Chargers 2-0, last week 16

The QB revolution is currently under construction at Sofi Stadium. In the meantime, JK Dobbins is running like a man with a new lease on life. After suffering two devastating injuries and bouncing back from both he is looking like the best running back in the league, and you can’t help but root for the guy. If Harbaugh can get Herbert to start playing like he wants soon, with Dobbins running like this, the Chargers are going to be no joke in no time. Let’s see how the run game holds up against Pittsburgh’s defense next week.

12) Green Bay Packers 1-1, last week 9

Every little thing is gonna be alright. Can’t think of a more fitting setting for that song than the Frozen Tundra, but that’s what should have been playing on the loudspeakers at Lambeau after Malik Willis first NFL win. Obviously, the defense picking off Anthony Richardson three times and Josh Jacobs running half the distance from Titletown to Oshkosh helped Willis, but that’s all Green Bay is asking of the third year QB. Hold on for dear life until Jordan Love is healthy enough to make his return.

13) Cincinnati Bengals 0-2, last week 19

Did the Bengals back up all the JUNK they talked in the lead up to the Chiefs game? Yes and no. Part of me wanted to see them get pulverized after having the audacity to run their mouths following a loss to the Patriots, but they came out and hung with the Chiefs in KC. I don’t love doing it, especially to a team that got a little too mouthy for their own good, but they are moving up the rankings because it looks like their annual whoopee cushion of start to the season is in the rear view and they are ready to start taking things seriously.

14) Pittsburgh Steelers 2-0, last week 20

The Steelers have more wins than they have touchdowns two games into the season. Can’t give you a better indicator of how things are going in Pittsburgh. The offense is essentially non existent, but as long as they don’t blow it the defense is going to put the team in a position to win. It’s never pretty but the Steelers have grown used to winning like this. Who knows if Russell Wilson is going to improve the offense or not, but if this team figures out a way to score the ball and give their defense a lead to protect that would make the Steelers very difficult to beat.

15) New York Jets 1-1, last week 12

I envisioned Aaron Rodgers’ first win with the Jets being welcomed to massive headlines, and A-spot slots on SportsCenter and even a parade down the streets of Manhattan. Their win against the Titans was about as unceremonious as you can get. Breece Hall has yet to get going and Rodgers is putting up Zach Wilson like numbers. It was enough to be the Titans, but is that really saying much?

16) Minnesota Vikings 2-0, last week 23

The shock of the season so far without a shadow of a doubt. Sam Darnold? The Vikings? 2-0? They are at the top of the NFC South after beating one of the worst teams in the league and one of the best teams in the league. Justin Jefferson doesn’t care who is under center, just throw him the damn ball and get out of his way. The Vikings defense had the Niners spinning in circles, and questioning themselves after forcing back to back turnover on downs in the first half. Every time you thought the Niners would kick into gear, the Vikings defense would come up with a big play to stifle one of the top teams in the league.

17) Seattle Seahawks 2-0, last week 21

For a team going through a transition phase, the Seattle Seahawks couldn’t have asked better opponents in the opening two weeks of the season. They played the Broncos and the Patriots, and beat them both. Not convincingly, but they are 2-0 and you can’t ask for much more than that. It will get tougher for Mike Macdonald’s team, but learning how to win games is an important part of growing as a team. Let’s see if that translates when they have to face some tougher opponents.

18) Miami Dolphins 1-1, last week 8

This season might have been a promising one for the Dolphins, but all that came to a halt when Tua suffered yet another concussion on national TV. I am not the person and this is not the time or the place for me to be speculating what the former Alabama QB future should hold. Devastated to see it happen again to someone who seems like a genuinely great guy. The Dolphins will have to pick up the pieces and carry on with the season, but I can’t imagine it’ll be easy.

19) Cleveland Browns 1-1, last week 18

Someone had to win that game, it just wasn’t clear who wanted to. One TD was all it took to down the Jags on a soggy Sunday from Jacksonville. Did Watson do enough to calm the talk yanking him from the starting role? No. Did the Browns convince anyone with this narrow win? Nope. Do they deserve to move up the rankings? Not a chance.

20) Atlanta Falcons, 1-1 last week 25

I’ve never seen that movie Gone in 60 seconds, but I’m sure not even the great Nick Cage was able to pull of the kind of miracle that Kirk Cousins did in the Falcons final drive in Philly. Cousins knew the weight of that drive, the pressure and the consequences of not winning that game after their terrible start to the season against the Steelers. In six plays and 70 yards, Cousins and the Falcons went from a team on the firing line to a team that is suddenly going to be taken seriously in the NFC.

21) Arizona Cardinals 1-1, last week 24

If you don’t know, now you know, LA. Marvin Harrison Jr. put his name on the early season ballot for Rookie of the Year by tearing up the Rams and Kyler Murray had 140 yards and two TDs in the first quarter as Arizona treated the Rams like a wounded animal and took them out of their misery before they knew what was going on.

22) Indianapolis Colts 0-2, last week 18

Strange game from Anthony Richardson and the Colts who were hoping for a bounce back win after a decent performance against Houston last week. Let’s remember Anthony Richardson is still technically a “rookie” QB and there will be some rookie blues from time to time. It’s easy to see that 60 yard throw he had last week and expect that from him each and every game, but the reality is, rookies throw INTs and that’s what he did in Lambeau.

23) Los Angeles Rams 0-2, last week 10

Things went from bad to worse after the Rams narrow Week 1 loss to Detroit. It looked like they put all their chips on the table last week and had nothing left for the Cardinals on Sunday. Now here they are, 0-2 with both of their best WRs injured in the first two games of the season and an offensive line that can’t protect a 36 year old quarterback.

24) Chicago Bears 1-1, last week 22

As a true neutral who doesn’t care if Caleb Willams is the next Joe Montana or Ryan Leaf, watching him get clobbered over and over again in the second half against the Texans was tough. He got sacked 7 times and hit countless other times. The defense kept Chicago in the game for a second straight week, so credit to Matt Eberflus, but if this offense is going to take off and if Williams is going to be a great QB someday, he’s going to need some protection, and quick.

25) Jacksonville Jaguars 0-2, last week 13

Buzz your girlfriend, WOOF! It has no relevance to the game what so ever, but if you get the reference you know exactly what I’m talking about. Trevor Lawrence wasn’t amazing, but his numbers weren’t terrible. What was terrible was the Jacksonville QB and the rest of the offense once they got in the red zone. You can blame it on the rain all you want, but when you’re a team from a tropical hurricane prone area, you should be used to rain. We don’t see the Bills thrown for a loop when a blizzard blankets Orchard Park. Embrace your surroundings and win a game.

26) Las Vegas Raiders 1-1, last week 29

We didn’t expect much from the Raiders this year, and we especially didn’t expect them to beat one of the best teams in the league this early, but the defense beat up Baltimore and Minshew had a fantastic day passing. I’m not sure how many more of these kinds of games we will get out of the Raiders this year, but this will definitely boost the swag of a team that already has a healthy helping of it under Antonio Pierce.

27) Washington Commanders 1-1, last week 27

Jayden Daniels is by far the most NFL ready rookie QB of the top three picks taken in last springs draft. Sure, he and the Commanders played the Giants and they didn’t score a TD against New York but the red zone efficiency will come as the season goes on. You can’t ask a rookie to do everything all at once, but from between the 20s he’s been just about as good as a rookie QB can be two weeks in to his career.

28) New England Patriots 1-1, last week 26

The Patriots may not be a great team, but they are a better team than a lot of people thought they would be to start the season. As long as they continue to run the ball like they have been, Jerod Mayo’s defense is going to keep them in games.

29) Denver Broncos 0-2, last week 28

Nix took a few more risks, and threw the ball down the field a little more, but until he gets a little help from his running backs it doesn’t matter how much Sean Payton backs his QB of the future, the Broncos aren’t going to win football games.

30) Tennessee Titans 0-2, last week 30

How to lose a game in 10 seconds: Let the other team block a punt. The proof is in the pudding. Two games, two blocked punts, two losses. The offense is going to make mistakes. They are young, and they aren’t that talented. What you can’t do is give teams other opportunities on routine plays like punts.

31) New York Giants 0-2, last week 31

This is pretty impressive from the Giants. They scored three touchdowns, and lost to a team that didn’t get into the end zone once. Good team finds ways to win games and bad teams find ways to lose games. This week the Giants opted to score three TDs, miss a PAT and they fail two two point conversions while the Commanders kicked their way past the Giants with a touchdown of field goals (7 FGs).

32) David Tepper’s team 0-2, last week 32

What do you want from me? To waste my breathe and my time on a team comes out and gets steamrolled on a weekly basis? Here’s an idea, gain over 200 yards in a game, and then maybe I’ll consider doing a proper write up on a team that I won’t even dignify naming.