Divorced but not separated: The reason why couples that split up are staying together
This trend reflects a broader shift in how people are rethinking relationships, family, and independence.
Divorce has long carried a familiar script: papers are signed, belongings divided, and one or both people move out. But the pressures of the modern world are causing that pattern to crack. Rising housing costs and stubbornly high mortgage rates are pushing some separated couples into a new reality: staying under the same roof, even after the marriage is over.
For many, the mathematics are simple. Walking away from a home with a historically low mortgage rate means signing up for a far pricier loan somewhere else. Renting isn’t much better, with monthly payments easily costing more than a decent mortgage.
In some households, this means living on different floors or splitting up bedrooms, and creating out private zones in what used to be a shared space. In others, the setup looks more cooperative, where former partners treat each other more like roommates than ex-spouses. For parents, the decision often centres on their kids: maintaining stability and keeping them in the same neighbourhood or school.
The NY Post did some research into the matter, with one divorcee telling the outlet: “The finances can work. The boundaries are harder. I’m not in her space all the time. She’s in mine more. But then there’s clearly no intimacy and other parts of what a marriage is.”
Another called it a lifestyle “of convenience,” adding that “it brings my daughter’s parents into the same house again, and, financially, it just makes sense.”
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When handled thoughtfully, it can offer surprising benefits: financial breathing room, reduced stress on children, and even a smoother transition into post-divorce life.
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