Jens-Frederik Nielsen, Greenland’s Prime Minister, on Trump’s threats: “We choose Denmark. We choose NATO”
If Donald Trump is taking Greenland, he will have to do it the hard way.
When has a little worldwide condemnation ever stopped anyone? Why let a few international laws get in the way of your big boys-only bash? Treaties-shmeeties, ain’t that right, Donny?
It would appear so. For this is 2026, and the rule of law is gone, prosecution is only applicable for those on the other side of the divide I created, and Eastasia is currently the enemy. Or was it Eurasia?
Donald Trump, Leader of the Free World©, has his pair of beady light receptors, both of which are anecdotally rumoured to be buried somewhere within the mangrove forest of folds baked into the lump of tangerine gelatine that sits on the top of his undercooked terracotta neck, has his sights set on Greenland as the potential 51st state of the USA.
“Greenland does not want to be owned by the United States”
But before he does, Greenland’s Prime Minister has hit back. In a passionate speech next to Danish Prime Minister Mette Frederiksen, Jens-Frederik Nielsen made it as clear as the water from a Greenlandic icicle that ”If we have to choose between the United States and Denmark here and now, we choose Denmark.
Standing alongside his Danish counterpart in Copenhagen, one day before the Danish Foreign Minister Lars Lokke Rasmussen and his Greenlandic equivalent Vivian Motzfeldt are due to travel to the US to meet Vice-President JD Vance and Secretary of State Marco Rubio, Nielsen reminded everyone that: “One thing must be clear to everyone. Greenland does not want to be owned by the United States. Greenland does not want to be governed by the United States. Greenland does not want to be part of the United States.”
Naaja Nathanielsen, Greenland’s minister for business and mineral resources, reflected the same tone when speaking at a meeting with lawmakers in Britain’s Parliament: “People are not sleeping, children are afraid, and it just fills everything these days. And we can’t really understand it.”
“We have no intentions of becoming American… but we have worked towards more collaboration with the Americans for many, many years. We feel betrayed. We feel the rhetoric is offensive, but also bewildering.”
Trump, along with his cronies, have been pushing the clueless narrative that the United States has something of a divine right to own Greenland, somewhere I can guarantee Trump thought was actually covered in grass before being told about it by Stephen Miller.
By the way, while I’m talking about his chief ideologue, here’s a video found by Jimmy Kimmel that shows just what a wonderful and polite human being a young Miller was. I wonder where it all went wrong. Probably in the birth canal.
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