FAMILY LIFE
‘New study finds that parents do have a favorite child, and the whole family could be paying the price’
Being treated differently by a parent, whether it’s real or perceived, can cause long-term damage and create divisions within families.

They might not openly admit it but it’s more common than you think for parents to favor one of their children over another.
While a parent might say they don’t differentiate between their kids and try to treat all of them the same, for one reason or another, that’s not often the case and the children are highly aware of it. Favoritism can cause sibling rivalry relationships, deep-rooted resentment and long-lasting impacts on mental health later in adulthood as well as affecting within the family.
Being treated differently by a parent, whether it’s real or perceived, can cause long-term damage - especially as it tends to be a taboo subject - something that families just don’t want to talk about - or can’t.
In what ways do parents favor one child over another?
Examples of parental favoritism include praising one child more than another, buying gifts for one sibling but leaving the other one out, having a different approach to discipline - ie. letting one child get away with things that the other can’t.
A new study by the American Psychological Association published this week, Parents Favor Daughters: A Meta-Analysis of Gender and Other Predictors of Parental Differential Treatment, looks deeper into the issue can concludes that daughters are more likely to get preferential treatment or be favored over their male siblings.
Factors that contribute towards parental favoritism
The study examined favored treatment as predicted by birth order, gender, temperament and personality. It found that when favoritism was based on autonomy and control, parents tended to favor older siblings. Parents also reported favoring daughters. Conscientious and agreeable children also received more favored treatment.
Between-family studies suggest that children with sociable temperaments may help parents feel competent which can have an influence on positive parenting.
The paper concludes: “First, after controlling for other moderators, our models suggest that parents report they slightly favor daughters over sons (a small effect). Children report no differences. That is, daughters do not perceive that they are favored more than sons, and vice versa”.
A 2022 report by the The Survey Center on American Life found that 40 percent of Americans raised with siblings believed their parents had a favorite child.
It added that Americans raised in families in which they believe their parents had a favorite child felt lonelier and less connected to their siblings than those who said their parents did not pick favorites. Worse still, extreme cases of favortism can cause estrangement during adulthood.
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